I’m a professional (executive) chef at a fine dining establishment. I have been working the the culinary field for over 20 years. I continuously run into the problem of maintaining a job for a prolong periods of time. I struggle to maintain a job for longer than a year. I am struggling from burnout, with the 40+ hours a week. The refusal to exploit or be exploited for labor. I have talked with my therapist continually about what I can do to fight this but it seems to be a continuous problem. I live in a rather small “big city” and feel like I am running out of options of places to work because of the city size. I would love to leave the culinary field but I don’t feel like I can afford it. With the sky rocketing price of school, than does seem like a viable option either. I have talked with my wife (who is also audhd) and we have discussed moving out of the country (US), but that also is a struggle in itself. I feel really alone, worthless and unfit as a human being. I feel like everyone else is playing a game that I don’t know the rules to and I am force to continue to play it. Have any of y’all ever struggled with this? Do y’all have any insight, that I might be over looking? I’m not looking to get rich, I’m just wanting to afford my bills and not work 60+ hours a week. Any and all suggestions would be appreciated.
Do you know people in your line of work that have good boundaries? Can you learn from them?
I imagine hospitality is always hectic. My job is too. But there are people who are able to walk away when the day is over. I am focusing on building that skill. My work day ended an hour ago, but I’m just packing up. This is better than yesterday!
My line of work doesn’t allow for good boundaries. There is an ask. I told my boss last week that I was burnt out, he told me well find a way to get it done. I found out this morning I have a private dinner for the CEO and bankers from 5-10 tomorrow night, plus another event at noon that I have to prep for so I’ll be there at 9. Boundaries in kitchens only put targets on your back. I feel like that’s why I’m having so many problems right now is I’m setting boundaries and they aren’t being respected. I just feel defeated. I feel tired. I feel hopeless. I love cooking and I would like to think I am good at it, but I feel like I’m am exploited constantly.
I was concerned that this would be the case. I worked in hospitality for a few years and what you describe is what I remember. I did work at an event centre that was unionized for a while and that was much better. I imagine jobs like that are few and far between.
I hope you find a good path.
