My partner and I had our second a few weeks ago and I received a number of 100% genuine (and appreciated) “have fun with the kiddo” and “enjoy this time while it lasts” messages and you know what? I fucking hate the newborn phase.
Lack of sleep makes me angry, and the entire newborn phase is a red tinted haze of fury. Here i am in the middle of the GODDAMN night rocking this fucking potato for 45 fucking minutes and it’s just staring at me without blinking having the time of its goddamn life. My fucking feet hurt, I’m getting fat because food is the only thing that brings me the tiniest flicker of happiness, my partner is frankly a raging bitch and I’m sure I am in return, the toddler loses his mind at the drop of a hat, and I’m supposed to enjoy it?
Nothing about this is enjoyable. I hate every fucking second and I can’t wait to sleep train this goddamn barnacle who I CAN’T EVEN HELP CALM BECAUSE I’M NOT THE ONE BREAST FEEDING and I guess that means the only person the baby will relax with is mom. Being helpful and competent are core aspects of my self image, and this mindless sack of shit has robbed me of that.
I’m so fucking tired.
Here’s a reminder that Shaken Baby Syndrome exists because of this exact scenario. One of the best pieces of advice I have: Your baby won’t be able to fall off of the floor.
By that, I mean it’s perfectly okay to set them down on the floor and go for a quick 10 minute walk with your partner and toddler while the baby cries at home. Baby will be fine on the floor for a few minutes, especially if they’re not even holding themselves up yet. Walking away for a few minutes to recollect is much better in the long term for both you and the baby. People get angry when they’re sleep deprived, and even loving parents can end up hurting/killing their baby when they’re delusional from their fourth straight day without any rest.