I’ll take the “nice guy” hit for this, but no, not at all.

Active Listening is generally well-received, in my experience. Engaging with someone, asking follow-up and clarifying questions, maybe even going on a verbal detour when you want to hear more about something specific - tends to make for a good conversation.

YMMV. Some people just want a silent audience to consume their own personal podcast. Others get angry if you’re not the one carrying the conversation. But when you click, you can go back and forth like this for hours and feel like no time at all had passed.

It’s a feel good idea that hints at something true , and more over something we all want to be true.

But the reality is, as always, far more complicated than a single sentence can convey.

Improve yourself for yourself, not to impress others. Treat everyone with respect and compassion because it’s who you want to be, not because it will make someone remember you. And find a partner who makes you feel like you are choosing yourself, and then choose them everyday.

And above all else, including the above, don’t take life advice from strangers on the internet.

What people say they want and what they actually want are not always the same thing, and often they don’t even realize it themselves.

Depends whether they were actually impressed or not

Oh man, I remember a few years ago, I was on this bus ride back home from a work thing and this girl was sat next to me. She has a boyfriend and she knew that I knew, and we’re both not insanely talkative, but I had decided, fuck it, we’re on this bus ride together now, so we’re gonna have a chat.

And it was actually a good chat. She told me that she’s majoring in business studies, mainly because she didn’t know what to study, which I can relate to a lot, and then we just ranted about exams and professors and all that.

And at some point, she had a reaction like she just zoomed out from that whole situation and realized how long we’ve been talking and also that I’m actually interested in what she says.

I’m probably interpreting too much into this, but it almost felt like she was questioning her life choices, like maybe not even her boyfriend is that interested in her as a person.

Which would be sad, but unfortunately probably not that unusual either. 🫠

I will remember being annoyed by the annoying jerk, and I will remember spending enjoyable time with the guy I had a conversation with.

active listeners do not score

Seems like a generalization. Different strokes for different folks.

Im the best at listening! the best! did you know i am a very good listener?

what did you say?

How many people saying no to this are women?

No.